Ok, so I have a lot on my mind. Mainly about Jason. Like there are big questions flying between us... and they are so hard to answer. I mean, you want to answer how you want, and how the significant other wants, but then you don't know what to really say. It's the awkward phase in which is so confusing and often times leaves you feeling empty and sad. I don't know anymore. I've decided I am having a " Have no idea what to do, where to go, who to talk to, and who to hang out with" day. This is one of those days when I feel like getting in a car and just... disappearing for a few days without talking to anyone. I wish I had a car.... I would do it. I did try on my cap and gown for a prelim. fitting. That was sort of exciting. Then I made an appointment with my advisor to make sure everything is in order for graduation.That is fun. I am just not in my best mood. It's amazing that something innocent and naive can be this confused and misled in the ways of decision... If anyone has advice for one such as I, who is lost in a big world full of "no" , especially in relationship area, please, feel free to comment. Because the first time in my life.... I am speechless. An agonizingly tormented silence in which not one word can be uttered aloud. Though, my mind is racing with thoughts, envy, question, ultimate desires..... in human words.... THIS JUST SUCKS today. Anyways, I am going to be low key for a few days, so I hope to write once or twice more before the week is over, but we shall see.
Jessica
- oh so lost, confused, and worried.
No comments:
Post a Comment